Wedding planning is a stressful time for everyone involved. No one feels the strain more than the couple. It’s not unusual for romance to take a backseat to your wedding-related to-do lists and anxieties. From arguing over table plans to agreeing on colours, the slightest thing can drive a wedge between anyone. Here are a few things you might want to keep in mind to help keep the flame alight…
1. Set Ground Rules for ‘Wedding Talk’
It’s inevitable. There will be times while planning your day that see you or your partner (or both) tire of talking white chiffon all the time. The earlier you nip this in the bud, the better. You’ll thank each other for the sake of the wedding and your relationship.
Set yourselves a ‘no wedding zone’, like the bedroom or the dinner table, where you are not allowed to discuss anything about the wedding. This will allow the both of you to take each other’s time into consideration as well as the time you have for each other. If you know that during your evening meal together you can both let go of the wedding stress and laugh about something silly, you’ll both be happier. Take an hour out of a day when you both feel like it to discuss any majorly pressing issues with any of the plans, and with the two of you knowing what needs to be sorted you’ll be sure to get right to it.
2. Take Trips Down Memory Lane
Who said being romantic had to cost money? Take what little time you have left together as an unmarried couple to remind one another what got you both to this point. Read through old messages, flip through photo albums, surprise each other with the small things – cook dinner for your soon-to-be-spouse, spend a day on the beach together, like you used to do.
You can re-enact your first date, or just reminisce, but whatever you do always be sure to remember the times that brought you two together. After all, you’re still together and that means something, you wouldn’t be getting married if it didn’t, would you?
3. Stay Connected
You’re better together, we’ve established this already. Go for a walk and hold hands, embrace each other – don’t just give them a hug. Be present in the relationship, and let your partner be aware that you are there for no matter what. The reason you two are together is because you are connected, you fell in love with each other – don’t lose it because you’re too busy worrying about the day you’re supposed to spend falling in love with each other all over again.
4. Make Time for Each Other
Don’t be afraid to delegate a few odd wedding chores to close friends and family. What else are the maid of honour and bridesmaids there for, if they’re not able to help tie down the balloons to your arches or drape some linen to allow you and your betrothed to make time for each other.
Planning a wedding isn’t something that needs to be done alone, or between just the couple. Your friends and family should only be too glad to help out with the small things, and it’s a bonus as well if they’re married themselves – they’ll know how stressful it can be planning a big day like this, and might even be able to suggest other ways for you and your partner to keep the love alive during such a tumultuous time.
5. Form Your Habits Before the Ceremony
Humans are habitual creatures, it’s in our nature. We love routines, and we love sticking to them even more. Of course this is a discussion that might not even need to happen. You and your partner will naturally flow into a system that suits the two of you. Taking the time to step back and discuss your suppositions from marital life can be beneficial. Identify what you both need to do for each other to keep your boat sailing gently.
Spend your time engaged discussing your long-term and short-term goals; talk about kids, buying a house, a car, a dog, anything. Whatever you expect from this joint venture, be sure to let your partner know. Don’t expect them to be able to read your mind. Show them confidence, let your guard down and tell your loved one exactly how you feel. This will show them that you’re ready to make the biggest step of your life, together.
A little extra effort can lead to a wedding that lets you and your partner fall in love with each other even more or all over again for the same reasons as before and many, many more. There’s a reason people get engaged before getting married. The time you spend learning about each other all over again is never dull one. Don’t forget the reason you’re getting married. You wouldn’t be doing this if you didn’t love them.